Magnificent Weekend!
Mar. 18th, 2012 07:08 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
moominmuppetThis was an extra-uber-special date weekend. Along with it being a Chad weekend, my very long-term sweetie Katy arrived for a much-anticipated visit.
And this is where it gets hard to explain just how overwhelmingly lucky I am. It was a mellow, relaxed, silly, sexy, fun weekend with them and the household. Good conversation, Apples-to-Apples, West Side Market shopping and much nomming of excellent and tasty food, movies (introduced Chad to Brazil!), and much cuddling and napping (the only minor downside to the weekend was my own frustration with my fatigue levels).
I'm just regularly amazed at the awesomeness of the people in my life, and the dynamics between them. It is, essentially, my youthful pipedreams come true. I have my big communal household with critters and garden and wonderful creative/queer/kinky/poly/hippy friends. I have activism work I find rewarding. I have amazing partners and really incredibly low-drama and fulfilling relationships. And I've been rather shocked by finding a primary partner this past year who is capable of embracing all this about me. I have a community and home and work environment where I can basically just be myself. I have accepting biofamily and friends who celebrate all this goodness with me.
I'm 37. I've had these sorts of dreams for my life since I was a teenager. At many points along the way I despairingly thought that maybe it was all a pipedream, and I should just "be sensible". I especially thought that while learning all my painful poly and/or shared housing lessons over the years! But you know what? I did learn lessons. I did get better at communicating, and interacting healthily, and all that good stuff. I grew up, and my dreams didn't really change, they just matured along with me. And often I look around at my life and have a bit of trouble believing in it. Things aren't perfect -- there are always financial and health and other life stresses -- but they're damned good. Things that made me smile this weekend: two of the most important people in my life getting to know each other better, my partner and my housemate cuddled up on the couch together, late-night post-fun nom-fest, silliness and giggling and pictures and love. And communication -- so much goodness in the communication department. It amazes me how easily both Katy and I and Chad and I accomplish that these days.
Chad and I dropped Katy off at RTA for her trip home, and then he dropped me off at work on his way home. I'm here, I'm exhausted, but life is good. I feel like everything wonderful about my relationships with Katy and Chad has been abundantly reaffirmed. Also, special appreciation to my housemate G, who's a marvelous part of my life! And for Katy's fabulous wife, Miss T, who added her own special flavor completely unawares!
Well, I already posted this, but apparently I still have more to say. The way Chad and I fit together just continues to blow me away. It's no easy thing to start seriously dating someone who already have several long-term relationships. Even with the best of intent, it can be a hard road to walk to find one's place in the dynamic. His ability to accept not just me but also my existing partners regularly amazes me. Seeing them welcome him into my life has been a joy, as well. And it really does feel like the solidity between him and me is so based in mutual respect for each other's needs and autonomy. I never feel like he's trying to claim me, or possess me, or turn me into anything except who I truly am. As hypersensitive as I am about such things, he's doing a near-miraculous job. I love you, Chad!
And this is where it gets hard to explain just how overwhelmingly lucky I am. It was a mellow, relaxed, silly, sexy, fun weekend with them and the household. Good conversation, Apples-to-Apples, West Side Market shopping and much nomming of excellent and tasty food, movies (introduced Chad to Brazil!), and much cuddling and napping (the only minor downside to the weekend was my own frustration with my fatigue levels).
I'm just regularly amazed at the awesomeness of the people in my life, and the dynamics between them. It is, essentially, my youthful pipedreams come true. I have my big communal household with critters and garden and wonderful creative/queer/kinky/poly/hippy friends. I have activism work I find rewarding. I have amazing partners and really incredibly low-drama and fulfilling relationships. And I've been rather shocked by finding a primary partner this past year who is capable of embracing all this about me. I have a community and home and work environment where I can basically just be myself. I have accepting biofamily and friends who celebrate all this goodness with me.
I'm 37. I've had these sorts of dreams for my life since I was a teenager. At many points along the way I despairingly thought that maybe it was all a pipedream, and I should just "be sensible". I especially thought that while learning all my painful poly and/or shared housing lessons over the years! But you know what? I did learn lessons. I did get better at communicating, and interacting healthily, and all that good stuff. I grew up, and my dreams didn't really change, they just matured along with me. And often I look around at my life and have a bit of trouble believing in it. Things aren't perfect -- there are always financial and health and other life stresses -- but they're damned good. Things that made me smile this weekend: two of the most important people in my life getting to know each other better, my partner and my housemate cuddled up on the couch together, late-night post-fun nom-fest, silliness and giggling and pictures and love. And communication -- so much goodness in the communication department. It amazes me how easily both Katy and I and Chad and I accomplish that these days.
Chad and I dropped Katy off at RTA for her trip home, and then he dropped me off at work on his way home. I'm here, I'm exhausted, but life is good. I feel like everything wonderful about my relationships with Katy and Chad has been abundantly reaffirmed. Also, special appreciation to my housemate G, who's a marvelous part of my life! And for Katy's fabulous wife, Miss T, who added her own special flavor completely unawares!
Well, I already posted this, but apparently I still have more to say. The way Chad and I fit together just continues to blow me away. It's no easy thing to start seriously dating someone who already have several long-term relationships. Even with the best of intent, it can be a hard road to walk to find one's place in the dynamic. His ability to accept not just me but also my existing partners regularly amazes me. Seeing them welcome him into my life has been a joy, as well. And it really does feel like the solidity between him and me is so based in mutual respect for each other's needs and autonomy. I never feel like he's trying to claim me, or possess me, or turn me into anything except who I truly am. As hypersensitive as I am about such things, he's doing a near-miraculous job. I love you, Chad!
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Date: 2012-03-19 01:15 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-03-20 03:39 am (UTC)