Brains are so weird.
Feb. 27th, 2006 08:14 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
moominmuppetEspecially when my "real" mood and my biochemical mood are running counter to each other, which seems to happen not infrequently. Psychologically, I think I'm in better shape than I have been in a while, but biochemically I'm mildly depressed. It's very odd (almost as odd as being hypomanic but deeply dissatisfied with my life, which has also happened).
It feels like there's a lot in my brain that's been sorting out and working much better recently. This seems to be due to several different events in the relatively recent past, this weekend being one of the more pin-pointable and dramatic in that regard (the others notables being "letting go of left-over emotions about a dead friendship" and "feeling movement and progress in restrengthening and becoming closer again in a very valuable but damaged friendship").
I've noticed that I tend to bring certain things up in LJ right before they change; I know I've seen that same pattern in myself before, too. I think that finally getting to a point of discussing X, whatever X is, is in part an indicator of being close to being ready to tackle issues around X, and also functions as a prompt to do so, partially as a result of the feedback and encouragement.
So, um, yeah. I'm both very happy about a lot in life, and feeling back-of-the-brain maudlin (including waking up in the middle of the night to think depressing thoughts) about random shit the way I'm wont to do when I'm depressed. Ouch. Brain-twisty. Counseling tonight should be an especially interesting session.
It feels like there's a lot in my brain that's been sorting out and working much better recently. This seems to be due to several different events in the relatively recent past, this weekend being one of the more pin-pointable and dramatic in that regard (the others notables being "letting go of left-over emotions about a dead friendship" and "feeling movement and progress in restrengthening and becoming closer again in a very valuable but damaged friendship").
I've noticed that I tend to bring certain things up in LJ right before they change; I know I've seen that same pattern in myself before, too. I think that finally getting to a point of discussing X, whatever X is, is in part an indicator of being close to being ready to tackle issues around X, and also functions as a prompt to do so, partially as a result of the feedback and encouragement.
So, um, yeah. I'm both very happy about a lot in life, and feeling back-of-the-brain maudlin (including waking up in the middle of the night to think depressing thoughts) about random shit the way I'm wont to do when I'm depressed. Ouch. Brain-twisty. Counseling tonight should be an especially interesting session.
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no subject
Date: 2006-02-27 02:26 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-02-27 02:48 pm (UTC)They definitely feel different to me, although they can interact with each other in odd ways. The biochem doesn't feel sourced in external stuff, although it can be irritated by external stuff.